I didn't realize that Christmas is creeping up on me. So far my parents have put up the tree and we even have a present underneath!

Miss Daisy LOVES the Christmas tree skirt. Last year when we were putting all the xmas decorations away, we folded up the skirt, went to go look for the box, and when we came back she was sitting on the folded skirt with a "I know what you're doing, you're putting away my favorite sleeping spot" look on her face as well as a "This is unacceptable, how DARE you do this to me. I do not like this" expression. Yes, there are such looks. Any cat owner would know that cats have attitudes.

I'm using this time wisely I swear!

SO it's that last week of the semester. Tests tomorrow, project due tomorrow and here I am, in the PCL, sandwiched between the stacks because I couldn't get a table that was close enough to the proximity of the prized outlet. Yes, there is an insufficiency of outlets and desks to laptops and students. So while I wait for the laptop to charge up, and stalk my writing surface, I believe it will be time well spent to update this little blog. Right now I'm at 24% charged...looks like I'll be here a while.

Hmmm.....Thanksgiving was last week and it was well...ehhh..

It was the first Thanksgiving without either of my grandparents. Of course it wasn't the same, and Ago's presence was missed, but nobody mentioned it. I don't think that anyone wanted to bring it up. I genuinely think Ago enjoyed Thanksgiving. He never cooked anything, but he always joined us. He called it "el dia del pavo" and I believe that out of the whole year, it was this day that he ate meat.

But besides the point that this day encourages you to feast, Thanksgiving is a holiday for everyone. It doesn't matter where you're from, or what religion you are, everybody can celebrate it. Thanksgiving is a day just to say and give thanks. Something of that simple matter. And I think that's why my grandparents participated in it. With their different backgrounds and the fact that they were from different parts of the world, countries where this holiday was not celebrated, by participating in it, it brought them closer to their American grandkids.

ANNNNNDDDDD.....What else is new???

School is winding down. I'm drained from school and I don't want to talk about it. In the next few weeks I'll have time to process everything and then post on it.

I'm up to 45% yessssssssss!!!! I think I'll start studying now.

This past month.....

OMG. This past month has been so busy. Tests, papers, papers,papers, reading, social life, papers, reading, and did I mention papers? It seems that as soon as one ends another one begins...or maybe that's me. I always procrastinate on my papers and end up working on them/writing them the night before they are due. Four pages in four hours? I think so! But, I DO NOT RECOMMEND IT! I'm getting to old to pull that kind of stuff....like right now... damn, I should be writing on my paper, not this blog. One of these days I'm going to get down to the psychological aspect of why I procrastinate so much and wait to the last minute. Laziness is definitely a key factor but I'm going to go the path of self-diagnosis!

Anyways, I'm getting besides the point here. This is the reason that I'm blogging: for the past month I've been so busy that I "kind of" forgot that Ago had died. Now, "'kind of' forgot" is not the best terms to put it in. The mourning process is not yet over, but reality is setting in, I'm coming to terms with the fact that he is no longer with me. Yes, I had a little bit of a spout (actually it was more a tantrum-I'll cover that later [fml. procrastination anyone!]) in the beginning of October, but other than that it seems that I am slowly but surely moving on. What I wanted to do was stop time and take a moment to look back on everything. Unfortunately, I do not have that super power (although stopping time is that super power I wish I had; I fantasize about stopping time, I would use it to catch up on my sleep) but I have taken time to look back on everything, and while I do miss him, I know that he is not going to be back and that yes...life goes on.

But I am getting ahead of myself here. I have not been faced with significant moments in our lives yet. I have yet to come upon his birthday (he would of been 95), Thanksgiving, or Christmas. For these I will be remembering my memories of last years holidays.

Do i have to change my banner now?

What is Sparmenglish going to come to? It certainly not over; it's just beginning. I have plans for this blog, for this concept. But now, with the death of Ago I find that "speaking Sparmenglish" is now defunct. Really who is there for me to communicate this way with?

But I have found that Sparmenglish is more than the language/way I used to communicate with my grandparents. It also, somehow wrapped into my own identity. And that is something that I need to figure out: how each of them: My Armenian heritage, Argentine influence, and American nationality influence who I am.

Or...i can just say F@#$ this y'all. I'm Texan.

What will I say? How will I say it? (plain English or some Sparmenglish words thrown in?) Well, that's what this blog is for.

September 2 Catia 0

Well...after a mini vacation from blogging it's time to return. Even though, to my knowledge, I have no readers, it still helps me to get somethings off of my mind. So this is what has been missed:

• Ago died. Oh but I already blogged about that. It's setting in, the fact that he is no longer a physical presence in my life. I really miss him and I catch myself thinking about him a lot.
• I visited my family on the east coast. It's good that I did because two days after I left my grandmother was hospitalized. Cirrhosis of the liver I believe. A tainted blood transplant back in the 60s left her with Hep C. She's been living with it for years and she knew this could creep up on her. I don't think anyone expected it this soon though. Oh well. What my family went through last May and June is what we're going through right now. Home care, moving, hospitalizations: it's surreal.
• School started. That's always fun! (hint hint sarcasm). My classes are reading intensive and I'm already behind because....well....hmm....see below.
• September. Need I say more. I DO NOT like this month. In fact, I think I blogged about how much I hated it last year. Why do I have issues with September? (1) Its just a blahhh month. Nothing to special or significant going on. Actually i covered that last year... (2) September has not been good to me. I was sick (102 fever! doesn't help that there's a swine flu panic going around) and I sprained my ankle (damn racquetball). I played basketball for more than five years, I've been active, I exercise (I should more regulalry though) and I have never sprained my ankle before. Can you believe that? Actually that is soooo believable. Why am i even hung up about it? It happens to everyone. I think i'm just looking for reasons to hate this month. I think I'm anxious for November (I love it!) and so I want it to arrive as quickly as possible and September just "gets in the way" lol. October's better because the weather is nicer and it's fall, everything is changing. Hmmm....maybe a disseratation about September in grad school? Ojalá not. But I know...when i have a career I will be taking my vacations in September.

I can't think of anything else to worth blogging about in relation to this blog. But when something pops into my head, it will be noted!

It dawned on me today that people are not immortal. I learned that lesson with Ago. Somewhere, in the back of my brain, I truly believed that he was not going to leave this earth. I mean come on people, he basically outlived and survived a lot of things. He was a survivor and nothing could get to him. Genocide? Nope. Communism? He's just left (escaped is really the proper word though). Broken arm? No sweat. This man started using a treadmill in his nineties; he wasn't going anywhere!

But there where other plans for him. It was his time. He had lived for ninety-four years. And what was he living for? He took care of himself extremely well-why? What did he want to see?

Yes of course, he wanted to live for his family. He wanted to see my brother and I grow up, go to college, and live our lives, as with the rest of the family: his daughter (my mother), son-in-law and niece. But I like to think that he was peace with that. He knew we'd be okay.

About two months before he passed, my mother found The Armenian Golgotha translated into English. This book was written in Armenian by an Armenian priest, Grigoris Balakian. In it is a passage about Ago's father and how he died. Even Ago is mentioned. (I need to go back through the passage. I can't believe that I do not have a copy of this book). All of his life there was Ago's father mentioned...proof of existence...but only people who could read Armenian knew. In translation, there was Ago's father in English, in writing, through this the whole world knew that the Armenian Genocide was not a lie, it actually had happened, and Ago's father was a victim. And I like to think that with the translation of this book, Ago became at peace. He was at peace knowing that his legacy, that his father's legacy lives on.

I'm supposed to be writing a piece about Ago for the quarterly Armenian Magazine that the Priest publishes. I'm at a loss for words because I don't know what and how to write it. It seems that I want to write one thing, but my mother has her own ideas, and the Der Hayr is expecting something completely on his own. I have not been procrastinating this; I've been constantly thinking about what I want to say. It has not consumed me yet...but I have not been at home recently so it has not been as real. Whenever I'm at home is when reality strikes. When I'm in the ATX it's like "Yeah, Ago is gone...but I'm far away. If he was alive he would not be as big as my life if I was at home." Everything at home has been difficult. My parents have been mourning his loss, his things are scattered around the house, but i still can't believe he is gone. I went to Phoenicia yesterday and i really didn't want to go. I have yet to go to the Vitamin Shoppe. I don't really see a reason why...but i want closure with him there and it seems that if I go there he's somehow with me. I know that sounds...well...that sounds...

This is what I want: I want people to know the real Ago, what kind of man he was, but of course this has to be kept in the context of the Armenian heritage and religion, so....no still i want people to know who Ago was. But first do I know who Ago was?

Memories of My Grandfather

Besides being Ago's only granddaughter I was also one of his chaeffeurs. Immediately after he moved to the Woods my mother and I tag teamed on taking him to the regular places: HEB, Krogerine, "that store", and the Vitamin Shoppe. While we frequented all these, the stores we went to on a weekly basis were HEB and Krogerine. Because it was like clockwork, the cashiers and produce department employees began to expect us. Kroger's knew that every Wednesday, Ago and either his daughter or granddaughter would come in, buy his produce and Evian, and pay with his favorite cashier, K and smile with his amigo, our bagger Lawrence. It got to a point where Kroger, a national chain grocery store, became like a local mom and pop place. Every time I left K would tell me "Say hi to your mom for me!"

We knew the people who worked there and they knew us.

When I went with Ago I always looked for our cashiers, Z and Miss Lisa. They both were so patient with us and I can't speak for them, but it always seemed to me that they were happy to see us and they genuinely like Ago. I'm having some trouble explaining why...but i have this to share.

I went to HEB last week, and I stuck to my hold habits: I looked for our cashiers. I went to register seven were i found Miss Lisa. Apparently my mother had informed them about Ago's death. Immediately she told me her condolences and then went on to tell me about her memories of my grandfather. I was touched: someone else telling me their memories of mygrandpa. I was so happy to hear he made a small impression on her. Here was a lady I knew because of a weekly routine, she was always patient and friendly towards us, and she was telling me about the time she postponed her break because my grandpa was waiting in her line. She talked about the way he kept track of his change, how he dressed, and the way he'd usually pay for my groceries. She mentioned all the things about Ago that defined Ago. She told me she didn't know her grandparents and what a blessing it is/was for me to have such a close relationship with mine. She talked about Ago in a way that made me grateful that I really knew my grandfather.

I think this is one of the last pictures taken of Ago. He came over to our house just to come over. Maybe there was a specific purpose, I really don't remember. But, I love this picture. Everything about it: Ago in the passenger seat (I was taking him home), his hat, his jacket, el bastón, is Ago. And the smirk on his face has evolved from icy stares at the camera to a state of happiness that does not need a smile. Just a subtle grin.

Someone de-friended me on Facebook, and I don't know why. Did I mistakenly write something horrible on their wall? Not post on their birthday? Look at their profile? Or did they decide they didn't want to be friends with me? Participate in the Whopper Challenge? If it's the first one then why? Were we ever really friends? Apparently not I guess? Obviously there are more questions than answers that...so......I'm a little upset, but I'll be fine. Compared to everybody else, my friend amount is low so every friend counts! Oh wait-it's quality not quantity that counts in a friendship, right?? Take that Facebook.

Today I realized that I spend too much time on Facebook. It's ridiculous. And I'm not even being productive. Just looking at other people's status and their profile. I could be doing more productive things with my time. That's why I have decided to take a little break from Facebook. Starting tomorrow morning I will not be checking Facebook for several days. At least until the weekend is over. Instead of logging in, I have come up with a list of things to do instead:

• Work on this blog. (Duh!) This blog means a lot to me but I don't think I've accurately portrayed that.
• Read. I love to read. Right now I'm working on Fasting, Feasting by Anita Desai. I started reading this book back in May when Ago was in the hospital. It's taken me too long to finish it. Almost three months. That is so wrong for me. I've been known to finish books in one day. (Well...those are usually my legal thrillers, the John Grishams')
• Speaking of Grisham, I still need to read The Associate.
• Exercise. What more can I say? I don't need to list this--this needs to be done everyday.
• Cook. I should bring down my tagine and use it more often. Whenever I use it everything turns out delicious. And also try cooking the things I've always wanted to but never had the time and probably won't have the time too in the upcoming months. Like Lobster. I know, I know too ambitious for a novice.
• Watch TV? I question this one because lately I've noticed that I don't have the patience to watch television anymore. But if I'm being entertained or learning then that's productive.
• Art. Learn it/Create it. I have some nupastels that I've been itching to use. Along with a large sketch pad they're just sitting in my room in the package.
• Sleep. I learned last semester that naps are GOOD.
• Explore the ATX. I feel like there is so much more than what i already know. And I'm missing out on a lot of what it has to offer.
• Study/get ahead for next semester. Yeah right. Notice how this one is last.

We'll see how everything turns out. Ojalá that this all works out and my time is used in a more productive manner. I know---no----I am sure that it will be.

Time to get back to blogging

I can't think of anything new to blog. It's been a rough past couple weeks and I don't want to imagine how the next year is going to be. Birthdays, holidays, will all seem so different now. His presence in our lives, in my life, was so huge that now all there is is an empty space. I knew he would pass away one day, but I thought it there would be more time. Processing this has been difficult, but contrary to what i previously stated, I believe time is key.

1914-2009

I never thought that after the last post things would change so much. A little over a week ago, My grandfather, the one this blog is about, passed away. Ago was 94. He was in and out of hospitals and nursing homes for about five weeks. Apparently, back during Memorial Day, he might of suffered some kind of stroke affected his swallowing. Food and water would not go to his stomach, but to his lungs, and that would cause him to have aspirated pneumonia. A feeding tube was then inserted in him and then that was his demise. Once he had the feeding tube, I began to notice he was no longer the Ago that I knew. I didn't want to think that things would never go back to the way they were, but once he went to rehab (to relearn how to swallow) I think we all had a feeling.

So now he is physically gone but he lives on in us and our memories. Though, I don't think I realized how big of a part of my life he was. It seems like there is a big empty hole in my life. I keep waiting for him to come back, but yet I know that he isn't. Last weekend, I went to his place to pick out a few things that I wanted. Some of the things that he had were special to me and instead of throwing them out or giving them away i brought them back with me. But, I couldn't bring myself to go through his closet too much because I kept thinking he's going to be back and he's not going to be able to find anything. I didn't want to clean the dishes because that was probably one of the last things he did before he was taken to the hospital. It was difficult because everything evoked so many memories. I inventoried his vitamins and i remember when he bought some of them. The frustration on my face when he would tell me the name of the one and I had no f-ing idea of what he was talking about. Still brings me a smile. I realize that i well never have one of those moments again.

Right now, I'm thinking and feeling different emotions, but as time progresses I'll be able to organize my thoughts into what I want to say.

By the way, this is the last picture we took of Ago. It might be hard to see but Ago was smiling in the picture. He was super excited because we were going to "that store" and the Vitamin Shoppe, so it was a double outing. On the carrito is the "I'm A Longhorn Grandpa" bumper sticker. I couldn't help myself from putting it on! This is also classic Ago, hat, bastón, and carrito, three things we can never leave home without.

Warehouse in the closet

Many times I have taken Ago to his "candy store" aka the Vitamin Shoppe. Every time we went he'd buy a lot. I mean, I'm pretty sure there have been sometimes when that store has been in the red and then Ago comes along and well....half an hour later they're in the green. First we'd get the regular stuff, like vitamin B 12, Kelp, Flax Seed Oil, and calcium. Then he'd be more daring and try some new things that he read about in his go-to, factoid book Recetas Que Curan. He has two copies, both in Spanish, and according to him they are the most useful books he's ever read. He swears by them. (Big thanks to my mother for giving him one as a gift...haha). Anyways, I always wondered, since we were buying the same things every month, how fast does he go through everything? Well....i learned that it takes sometime to finish the dosage and in the meantime you keep buying until it get to the point that you have a warehouse of vitamins and supplements in your closet. (His hat collection is also visible. We never leave home without one!)

It looks like he's either hoarding his things or waiting to sell them....but to whom? It scares me that this many pills. I understand a couple here and there for certain issues, but come on! All he's missing is Muscle Milk and Redline then he'll actually be the Vitamin Shoppe. Here's a close up:

Same with the 1L and 1.5L bottles of Evian, hoarding....OR stocking up for hurricane season? haha. By the way, Evian is the ONLY water Ago will drink. I hear AGUA! AGUA! EVIAN Y NADA MAS! every time we're at Kroger. I have literately seen this man drop some serious cash for Evian (not as much as the Vitamin Shoppe, though), as obvious by this picture.

Happenings

I've taken a longer break from blogging than I thought. Not that I was actively posting before but I had started a habit of blogging at least something every couple of days. But then Ago was hospitalized and I was in no mood to express any ideas. The situation has been a bit surreal as seeing that I never thought that this would ever happen to my grandfather. The timeline goes a little like this: first, Memorial Day weekend Ago suffered a stroke that caused him to lose the ability to swallow. Whatever he swallows does not down his esophagus, it will go down his trachea into the lungs which can lead to pulmonary aspiration, aka pneumonia. Pneumonia + 94 year old Ago = not good. So, after almost a week in the hospital Ago got a feeding tube to get his nutrients and then was transported to a rehabilitation center to relearn how to swallow (many comments on this later). Then, Ago didn't even spend a week in rehab, before he ended up back in the hospital. I knew this was going to happen, going to rehab wasn't going to help that much. How is a 94 year old man supposed to learn how to swallow? How is Ago supposed to learn how to swallow? He is the most stubborn person I know, it if somethings not done his way he won't do it, and on top of that he thinks he is cured. He doesn't understand the complexity of the situation.

My mother has been using the word "surreal" to describe the situation. I can't speak for her what she is going through, but it is surreal for me also. The relationship between Ago and everyone is the family is different. I always believed that My brother and I got the softer side of him (if it even exists) because we are his grandchildren. And I like to believe that I knew Ago at his best, even though there have been some ugly times. That's why this is so surreal, I'm seeing a different side of him. I'm seeing helpless Ago: Ago in his hospital bed, needing assistance to move. I've never seen helpless Ago. This man is always on the move. I turn around at HEB and he's already moved on to the next section.

I will say this: he's still being assertive and stubborn, which is exhausting for everyone but also assuring because he still got it.

1959

The month of May hasn't been that great for us or my grandfather. He's fallen down three times and on the third fall he ended up in the ER. This happened over the weekend and he's now in the hospital with a throat infection. Anyways, watching Ago today, I realized something: my grandfather doesn't live in 2009. He's still in 1959. Everything about him, the way he eats, the way he thinks, the way he dresses (definitely the way he dresses) screams 1959. The only things that are of this year are the treadmill and printer/copier/fax. Actually, I don't even think 2009 is accurate because he's lacking a cell phone.

So his mentality is still in 1959 but that's not necessarily a bad thing, its just Ago. He's always been like this. Stuck in the past, un-willing to change his ways. Just look at his wardrobe. The hat and the jacket look straight of a 1950s movie and the man has not bought new shoes in like 20 years!

The past couple of days have been interesting and (obviously) humor has been helping to cope. Watching Ago the way he is right now is difficult but every time he pulls one of his Agosims I can't help but laugh. Every time he confirms what just happened or barks orders, such as close the blinds, shut the door, or go to his house and bring him his Evian and the yogurt I can't help but think that's my grandfather.

Absorbed in my own thoughts

What if I blogged entirely in Spanish? That just crossed my mind. I think I am capable of doing that. I've been studying the language for enough time. I guess one day when I get bored....

Well, I've been branching out the Sparmenglish name. I wrote about my blog and the discourse that I've been a part of (I'm on Armeniapedia and I should be writing that essay right now). And, I wrote about it in my linguistics essay. What I want now is feedback. I want to know how others perceive the Sparmenglish language. Is it worth it to keep blogging about? (actually, i don't care about that one, i'll keep blogging). Is it worth it to continue my goals and plans for it? I've been toying with this idea, with Sparmenglish, for quite sometime now and i'm getting hesitant about what direction I can run with it.

"That Store"

There are certain stores that Ago only goes to with me. One of them I call "that store". I do not want to call it by name because I don't want any affiliation to it, but I will give hints: it's huge; it sells a lot of stuff; It destroys small town businesses; oh, and you can NEVER NEVER NEVER find some one to help you when you need them--they always pop up when you don't. Got the idea? When HEB starts carrying prunes we'll stop going.

Well, we went to "that store" today. Ughhh. And I can't remember what we bought. But some people were very inconsiderate of us. I don't expect red carpet treatment when I take Ago shopping but I expect people to let this man pass with his cart. No that didn't happen. He almost ran into a family of four. And the looks that we get, some are mean; some people get mad at us because take up half the aisle and walk slow. But I think most looks are out of ignorance. They have no idea who we are, or where we're from, and they probably will never see someone dressed like my grandfather in their beloved store (hat, trousers, button down shirt, jacket usually tweed, outdated, and the shoes, oh! I'll have to write a post on his clothing). There are some people just stare with confusion. It is very uncomfortable for me to know that I am being watched (and judged maybe?) by a complete stranger. On top of that, I'm yelling (Ago's hearing problem) in either Spanish or Armenian, or both most of the time and he's yelling back so it paints funny picture of me searching for I don't even now what because he mispronounced it or it was written illegiblly on his grocery list. (One time he kept yelling "COLOR X" and when I looked at the list it actually was Clorox. So we go to the clorox aisle and i pick one up for him and he says "NO, ASIGAH NO. COLOR X! NO ESTA AQUI"). However, there are people who smile and are patient, and curious. But not enough types to counter balance each other.

I know that I sound whiny when I complain like this, but I do expect people to be coinsiderate of us when we're at the store. He's 94 years old, and he's doing his own shopping. I'm there to provide transportation and bag fruit. There are people in "that store" that are clearly twenty to thirty years younger than my grandfather, and they use motorized scooters. WTF? This man is 94 years old, he's pushing his own cart; if I ever offered one of those scooters he'd throw a tantrum.

--> So I just read over my post and realized that the way I wrote the last part makes it sound like age triumphs handicap.

The Treadmill part 2

I mentioned this a couple of posts back, about Ago buying a treadmill, well...he did. My 94 year old grandfather is now a proud owner of a top of the line treadmill. The kind of treadmill that you'd expect at the gym, not a home. Ago had been mentioning this for ages but I didn't think he'd actually go through with it. He has always exercised, in fact when I was younger I vividly remember him walking to nearest grocery store, Randalls, with his carrito every day to buy fresh produce. (Now we take the car to go to HEB; he has the same kind of carrito though.) He'd take the bike paths that are intertwined in the neighborhoods, but still Randalls was at least a mile away, one way, and he did this while he was his late seventies and early eighties. Now, within the past seven years, he has been walking on the treadmill at the gym in his complex for fifteen to thirty minutes. He's actually pretty good, (that's what the salesperson said) he has arthritis in his back. I don't think he takes anything for it, but the exercise helps him. I have to say I'm a little impressed (and proud) that he is so physically and mentally active. When I get older, I want to be able to walk on the treadmill everyday, hell, I want to go on walks everyday.

I haven't seen the treadmill yet, but I have two predictions of what it might be like:

1. He will Agoptize it. AKA he will make it his own by tying string somewhere. Nothing truly belongs to Ago unless there is string on it.

2. I'll be told that even I can use it. I didn't get any of the Wusthof scissors, but I can run on the new treadmill!

Writing ensayos

Hoy en la clase de español tuve escribir un ensayo. First of all, I don't do my best "essay writing" in class. I need time to prepare to prepare my thoughts and organize my content. (I don't know how i'm going to do on my English final, half of it is in-class open book essay). Also, i hate the time crunch you have with in-class essays. I'm so concerned that I'll run out of time, and then i start to freak out, and then i get bewildered. At least at home I control how much time i have to write. Second, and this is the part that pertains to this blog (my goal is to have all my posts relate in some way to Sparmenglish or at least to my grandfather...i don't want this blog to turn into me ranting and complaining) this essay was in supposed to be in Spanish, but i'm pretty sure i made up some Sparmenglish words. I did it on the last essay tambien. "Percent" is not "Porcente" but actually "Porcentaje" so i was pretty off there. We'll see what new words i come up with soon.

Spanish is an interesting class. I feel like i'm learning everything i need but i don't think i'm using what i've learned and i can honestly say some of the things that we cover I have NEVER heard in the house before. I don't think my mother really distinguishes between the preterite and imperfect. And I'm positive that Ago does not use the subjunctive. In fact, i question how much Spanish my grandfather uses. The majority of his conversations with my mother and aunt are in Armenian (i say majority because spanish is infiltrated in those conversations) and when he speaks Spanish it's like he's repeating the same sentences. Ohhhhhhh....that's a good post topic: What my gpops says in Spanish. I'll have to elaborate on that one when i'm not so tired.

The Treadmill

The treadmill. That is a word that has been creeping up in Ago's vocabulary for a couple of years now. Ago spends fifteen minutes everyday walking at a slow pace on the machine. His old complex used to have a gym and i believe that his new place has a gym as well. Well, that is not good enough. It turns out that Ago has to have a treadmill in his own living room. Apparently, right now he is saving to be a "top of the line" treadmill in Marzo. If he's going to wait a whole year to buy the treadmill, then we're going to have to hear about it for a whole year. We'll be reminded about how he he needs to save money for it; the health benefits of a treadmill, and he'll tell us how nice it is to exercise in the comforts of ones home at any hour they please. It will get old. But at his age of 94 this kind of exercise is good for him. I do have to say though, i've been pretty impressed by my gpops efforts to keep up with technology. He doesn't have a cell phone or computer, but this man has a printer and fax machine. And he had an iPod before everyone else!

So today I went to see my grandpa and it was a little different from all the other times that i have gone.  Whenever i come home I usually go to see if he needs me to take him anywhere so that my mother won't have to, but surprisingly today he needed to go nowhere.  So now what do I do?  I just got here.  I can't leave.  He hasn't seen me for three weeks.  What am I supposed to do?  So, I stayed for awhile. He enticed me with food: an Argentine pear and a Cameo apple.  Like we don't have any fruit at home.

When this happens I usually just sit, watch some television or read a book but today was different because I sort of had a conversation with my grandfather.  As of now we still don't speak a same language, but we both can understand Spanish, Armenian, and English.  The conversation, which was mostly in Spanish, was him lecturing and me listening and I understood all of it.  Everything that he was trying to say, I understood, I got, I was able to come home and tell my parents about.  I can blog about it, but I won't.  The only parts worth blogging were the importance of Spanish and maybe what nutrients almonds have (magnesium, vitamin B6, calcium).  But, what Ago and I have is a sort of emotional bond.  Words don't have to express what we are thinking or feeling, our emotions explain it.  But how? He knew that i understood what he was saying, and I knew that he knew that I just understood--if that sentence makes any sense at all.  

AGHHH!!!!  I am having difficulty explaining this "deep emotional stuff."  Maybe i'll just stick to entertaining stories and save the rest for a book.  

la grocería

Ago lives by structure.   He has his set schedule and it cannot be changed.  He wakes up at 4 am goes to bed at 8 pm.  Between those hours, I assume he is organizing his vegetables, inventoring his vitamins and preparing his meals (those take longer than you'd expect).  But all of that can be shuffled around.  What can't be changed, these are set in stone, are our trips to la grocería.  I honestly think that these are the highlights of his week (he knows that if he wants to go somewhere else i'll take him, but it's always the same places).  We usually hit up two stores twice a week.  He does not need to go twice a week, once a week is sufficient, but these are not just trips to get the perishables, these are also social events.  He gets soooooo excited, the smile on his face lights up the car.  When we go to the grocery store, we know everyone...and they know us.  We always go early to avoid the crowd, before 9 am, 8:30 if i'm up early enough; I recommend this.  It makes a difference to go in the morning, the produce is fresh, presentation aesthetically appeasing, and the selection is better (omg! I am too young for this).  Anyways, we get there before the crowd, so i'm pretty sure that the the guys who work in the departments that we frequent (produce) know us well.  

But what really makes the difference are the people at the check-out.  We have cashiers who open registers just for us, converse with us, throughout the time i've been chaufferring my grandfather, I have gotten to know the employees at the grocery stores.  I even know the ages of their kids and if they're trouble makers!  Even though all we go to are the chain supermarkets, because that is really all there is near us, it feels like a neighborhood grocery store.  I have stories about some of the employees we have encountered, especially the sackers....that's another post.  Ohhhhh....Ago has his sacker amgio, I'll just call him L.  He is a character!  Even they don't speak a word of the same language, they are from the same generation so they have this kind of unspoken language.  He deserves his own post.  Next time. 

The staples (food and vitamins)

I took Ago to the grocery store last week.  I went early too.  I arrived to pick him up at around 8 am.  8:15 I was bagging grapes.  Besides grapes (which were on sale!  He got like 3 lbs. and he bought some for me too!)  he  bought all the staples, like,, apples, avocados, bananas, and alfalfa.  Oh and milk, soya plan. The "plain" kind is very important.  He always asks what the expiration date is, which really throws me off because well...Silk brand of soy lasts like two months, and he devours it in like a week.  We're always buying soy milk so what difference does it make if it expires May 15??

Finally we got out to the car and before I even close my door my grandfather asks:  "TIENES TIEMPO IR A VEETAMINA AHORA?"

WTF?  I knew it! I mentioned it in my previous post and I knew he was going to ask. 

I said no, plus his soy milk needed to be refrigerated so we went later in the afternoon.

The associates at The Vitamin Shoppe know us.  In fact,  they know us a little too well.  They know that once every month this old, healthy, and loud man comes into the store with a patient often times frazzled young lady (me).  They know that he will probably make their sales goal for the day and they know what products he will buy.  They always help him get the things he needs and they never try to sell him anything.   

This time when we went three things stuck out.  

When we entered the store the first thing I noticed was that there were people in it.  I know that the purpose of stores are for people to go in and shop-i worked in retail- but i never thought of the Vitamin Shoppe as a place to browse and shop.   All the times we went in before, we were the only customers.  Occasionally, some guy would come in and buy Muscle Milk or there would be a lady looking at something on the side that we never shop on, but that would be it.  

Second, one of the managers greeted us by saying "Hello!  We haven't seen you all around here.  We thought something happened, like he moved."  OMG.  So The Vitamin Shoppe is keeping track of when my grandfather goes.  

Third, and this was baaaaaaddddddddd.  Veetamina decide to discontinue one of Ago's core products: Granulated Kelp.  Yes, I know, kelp.  Whenever I hear kelp I think of what whales eat, and i do not like whales, so I don' t like to think about that.  Telling Ago that Kelp was discontinued was not something i wanted to do. He was going to get angry, complain, and get moody, all which would damper his joy of actually going to his "candy shoppe."  I did what i had to do and explained to him that they no longer carried it.  He reaction was expected: he was mad he yelled, the associates where sympathetic, but he got over it when he bought six bottles of Flaxseed Oil, some cornsilk and hyssup.

Ago mañana.  I am looking forward to it.  He called tonight and said he wants to go to la grocería.  Who knows, tomorrow in the car he might spring up another location for me to take him.  I never know but I'm never surprised!  

The Telenovela

Ahh....the telenovela.  The long-winded, dramatic, mini series.  I never watched them, but I heard the Brazilian ones are the best.  Now, with the help of YouTube, we can incorporate the telenovela into the langauge acquisition curriculum.  For a lab assignment (due mañana) necesito ecribir una escena.  I am having the hardest time coming up with material.  And this is what I do!  I usually am a creative person and I do use my imagination to create, let's call them, alternative worlds for characters.  This involves numerous subplots and complex characters that get in the way of each other.  It is not harmonious.  Anyways, I guess I'm having writers block?  Hmm.....night before it's due.  Well...something will come.  

Pienso que tengo meido de lo que digan mis compañeros.  No sé.  When it comes to creative writing I am protective because I don't like criticism when it comes to works based on one's imagination.  I need to get past that, quickly, but its all a figure of someone's imagination, there is no right or wrong.  You either like it or you don't-and its okay to not like the story.  Just say "no me gusta" instead of "it sucks" or quietly think to yourself that I may be out of my mind. 

Another Paper about Genocide...which i should be writing right now

Now that exams have kind of died down, it's time to be focusing on something more important (this blog ha..ha).  No, actually some essays.  I have a Spanish one coming up, that should be interesting, but right now my focus is on another paper for another class that is due soon.  How does this paper pertain to my blog?  Well...it's about Genocide, something I now rarely discuss with people (out of frustration) but is of the upmost importance to me.  In particular, I will be focusing on the ongoing genocide in Darfur and the media's coverage of it (eighteen words down only about a thousand more to go!). 

The subject of Genocide is extremely important to me.  It is my topic when it comes to papers, essays, presentations, but more importantly, its rooted in my family history.  I grew up hearing the shocking stories of the Armenian Genocide and as i got older i grew a disgusted with the fact that i continued to exist.  Also, not to mention, Genocide is kind of like my "fall back" topic.  You know, the subject that we can write an essay on that no matter what kind of information we find, it will always, always, always, be of interest of us.  Maybe a better way to put it is passion.  Yeah, passion is a good word.  

I would much rather be theorizing why I choose the subjects that I choose but right now journalist/political commentator/author Walter Lippmann is calling my name.  He makes some excellent points and I prefer I him from that other guy (you know who you are, Dewey!).  

And I Think Its Gonna to be a Long Long Time

Well....it's been a long long time since I last posted.  I shouldn't even be on here right now.  I have exams this week and i should be studying/panicking for those.  I have studied but it seems like its not enough.  Is it ever enough? I mean can anybody be fully prepared?  The one i'm worried about is Spanish.  I feel like i know the material, but i don't.  Por ejemplo, no puedo decirlo off the top of mi cabeza, I need time to think.  If you ask me: "Catia, what are the negative informal commands of these verbs: _____, _______, and _______?" I need to take the time to write: no juegues, no digas, y no comas.  Thankfully the exam is not oral, because then who knows what language will come out of my mouth.  I don't speak Armenian fluently at all, but sometimes when I'm in Spanish class, some words just slip out.  Suddenly, "I like apples" is me gustan khensors.  And ¿qué quiere? becomes einch u ssez?<-- Please note that is not the correct spelling of "what do you want?" in Armenian.  Most of the Armenian on this blog is translated into English letters from what it actually sounds like.  

And don't get me started on counting in Spanish.  It's not completely in Spanish.  It's more like this: uno, dos, tres, chorse, hink, vets, yote, ute, eine, deiz!  That's Sparmenglish for you.

I think I'll stick to counting in English.  

Ojalá que escriba en el blog más a menudo.    

Ethical Dilemma

What do you do when you see a set of keys lying on the ground?  This was on a corner outside of my building.  I was walking right past but I stopped to pick them up and take them to the office.  Who knows if the owner even lives near by? Did I have to turn them in or should I just have left them there? Were they better off where they were? What if the owner goes back to that spot (because they know were they lost it)????  Ahh....I over analyze insignificant things. There wasn't anything important on the anyways.  There were more keychains than keys.  I recently lost my gloves at an HEB.  I went back in the afternoon and checked the lost and found.  There they were.  Sooooooooo maybe the person who lost the keys would have some sense to check the places around where they were to see if someone turned them in.